it's 1.35am and i know i should be sleeping, because i've got to get up early. but i can't sleep, i can't stop thinking. i keep wondering; maybe if i was a better person, then maybe i'd be good enough for him, maybe if i tried harder to the quit the drug, then maybe i'd be good enough for him, because i've obviously not made enough sacrifices or changed enough about myself for him. but then i think? why the fuck should i? why the fuck should i change so much for someone who hasn't shown any sign of caring about me, for days. why the fuck should i change even more for someone who wouldn't do one think i asked? and then i think; maybe he's worth it. isn't that why i changed in the first place? because i thought he was worth it. but now a few months down the track; are you still worth it? please, just show me you still care.
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